Thursday, 7 October 2010

An update on my staff

Well gorgeous people, you're probably wondering how my staffing is going. I had that disaster in the summer with my night nanny leaving after I blogged about her. There have been endless run-ins with my personal trainer and I had to get rid of the dog walker after she started screwing with the labradoodle's head (that doesn't sound right for some reason).

I never did get round to replacing the night nanny, I actually started getting up in the night by myself! It was hard darlings, let me tell you. It does nothing for your beauty sleep having to get up in the night and tend to the baby. But I managed it and Tulip sleeps through most nights now. I sleep trained her you see, much better than that night nanny.

The personal trainer is still making me do 50 minutes of interval training each day and 40 minutes of weights. He's made me give up cigarettes and alcohol and he's desperately trying to take my espressos away from me. He'll never manage it in a million years darlings. He's cruel. He's a cruel, bitter man. In fact I'm suddenly wondering why he's on my payroll? Oh because he helps me have a fabulous figure darlings! You wouldn't believe I've had four kids.

Walking the dog is hard work, but after my shoe dilemma I decided on some Hunter wellies. Now I've never worn them before in my life but Kate Moss showed me photos of her Glastonbury look when she was with that Babyshambles bloke and there's nothing quite like teaming up a bit of Stella McCartney with wellies. If Kate can do it so can I.

I still don't see eye-to-eye with the nanny, she smells strange to be honest. Not unwashed, just an odd choice of perfume. I keep meaning to buy her a bottle of J'adore. But Gabriel and Tulip lover her, so what can I do? I put my children first darlings, always.

Oh must dash actually, Patsy Kensit's at the door. Ciao ciao for now xx

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