Sunday, 10 October 2010

Lifestyle tips for busy mums: the supermarket

SupermarketI continue with my series of Lifestyle Tips darlings. So many of you have got in touch to say how useful you find these tips. So all I can do is continue writing them sweetie! Mwah.

This time I'm going to talk about the supermarket. But before I start I have a confession to make darlings. I never go to the supermarket. However, I believe I'm able to tap into the minds of ordinary mums with such empathy that I can still provide good advice on how to tackle the supermarket. And reading this, gorgeous mums, I'm sure you'll agree.

My first rule for visiting the supermarket is: don't take the children. Leave them with the nanny. It's just not worth the headache trying to take the children with you. They get bored and hassle you to buy things. They cramp your style.

I believe life is a catwalk sweetie and this means you need to look good even in the supermarket. You never know who might be there or when your photo might be taken. A well chosen outfit makes all the difference, you don't want to look like you actually work there do you darling?

Just as you need to look good, your basket or trolley also needs to look good. Buy quality brands, choose your cheese, coffee and wine very carefully. Your goods need to have some refinement and show some degree of selection and class. This can be learnt darlings, believe me. My Dad worked in a chip factory but I worked my way up.

You may be wondering where I buy my consumables. Well I have a gorgeous organic hamper delivered to me every Tuesday and I pick up my store cupboard items in Fortnum & Mason. Actually my PA usually picks those up but I will do it occasionally. I believe I need to maintain some connection with the food I eat and where it's from.

That's all for now my beautiful people. I hope you found my tips useful busy mums! More from me soon. Mwah xx

Photo credit: are supermarkets seriously as depressing as this picture?

Thursday, 7 October 2010

An update on my staff

Well gorgeous people, you're probably wondering how my staffing is going. I had that disaster in the summer with my night nanny leaving after I blogged about her. There have been endless run-ins with my personal trainer and I had to get rid of the dog walker after she started screwing with the labradoodle's head (that doesn't sound right for some reason).

I never did get round to replacing the night nanny, I actually started getting up in the night by myself! It was hard darlings, let me tell you. It does nothing for your beauty sleep having to get up in the night and tend to the baby. But I managed it and Tulip sleeps through most nights now. I sleep trained her you see, much better than that night nanny.

The personal trainer is still making me do 50 minutes of interval training each day and 40 minutes of weights. He's made me give up cigarettes and alcohol and he's desperately trying to take my espressos away from me. He'll never manage it in a million years darlings. He's cruel. He's a cruel, bitter man. In fact I'm suddenly wondering why he's on my payroll? Oh because he helps me have a fabulous figure darlings! You wouldn't believe I've had four kids.

Walking the dog is hard work, but after my shoe dilemma I decided on some Hunter wellies. Now I've never worn them before in my life but Kate Moss showed me photos of her Glastonbury look when she was with that Babyshambles bloke and there's nothing quite like teaming up a bit of Stella McCartney with wellies. If Kate can do it so can I.

I still don't see eye-to-eye with the nanny, she smells strange to be honest. Not unwashed, just an odd choice of perfume. I keep meaning to buy her a bottle of J'adore. But Gabriel and Tulip lover her, so what can I do? I put my children first darlings, always.

Oh must dash actually, Patsy Kensit's at the door. Ciao ciao for now xx

Wednesday, 29 September 2010

Revealing the title of my new book!

So exciting darlings! I'll reveal the title after I've given you an update on my week. As usual, things never run smoothly in the CM house. There I was enjoying London Fashion Week and I attended an intimate little designer soiree after hours last Thursday.

Well I don't know what happened because I wasn't even drinking. But somehow I twisted my right ankle after powdering my nose (I don't use that as a euphemism any more in case you were wondering. Well actually it is a euphemism for going to the toilet but not that other thing which it is a euphemism for. I digress), I blame Jodie Kidd because she was beckoning over to me at the time and I tried to walk too quickly. That Jodie doesn't even need to wear heels she's so tall. Pah.

Anyways, I had to be carried to my car. So embarrassing sweetie. And then I was laid up for two days! Last Friday saw me stretched out on the sofa with Gabriel and being subjected to CBeebies. What is Waybuloo all about darlings? Can someone explain? Although I do have a soft spot for Balamory. There's something about Archie the Inventor isn't there? The quietly spoken posh ones are always the worst.

Thankfully my ankle is better now darlings, thank you for asking. And after four days in flats (bleugh) I am finally elevated again.

And now for my book title! Sweetie, my book is called 'Diamond Nights'! This is for two reasons:
1. I loved that song 'Diamond Lights' by Glen Hoddle and Chris Waddle. It reminds me of being with Actor Ex-Husband (who I still hold a torch for, it only ended because he was gay)
2. My favourite drink for years was 'Diamond White'. Especially mixed with Malibu. That's how I got pregnant with Leaf. Such fond memories.

So it's going through some final edits, but hopefully Diamond Nights will be in a bookstore near you very soon sweetie! And in case you need reminding, here's the synposis:

"Fi Fi is a beautiful actress with a terrible secret. She's torn between two men she truly loves: Fabio the singer and Benjamin the actor. Fi Fi has to navigate her way through the celebrity world never really knowing if anyone is who they claim to be. And there's a wealthy media mogul who seems to have it in for her. As she battles with negative media exposure, her lovers, a shoe addiction and Irritable Bowel Syndrome, Fi Fi embarks on a path into her past which yields up a tragic family story which changes her life forever."

Wednesday, 22 September 2010

Lifestyle tips for busy mums: looking good at the school gate

London Fashion Week PhotographersPhew what a week darlings, London Fashion Week always has such an impact on my diary and we're only on Wednesday. I need a lie-down. Burberry was fabulous yesterday and my gorgeous Leaf was in the show. I'm so proud of her although I do worry about her in the modelling world too. It's not a nice world.

Anyhows sweeties this talk of fashion has made me think about how us mummies dress when we're out and about. So many of you will be doing the school run now and the biggest dilemma is 'What to Wear'?

There's no doubt you need to impress the school and the teachers when you turn up at the gates. And other mummies too. After all, you're paying a lot of money for your child to attend the school, the least you can do is look the part (I'm aware some children may attend state school, but you probably need to make an effort there too).

Time can be short in the mornings so I advise you lovely mummies to decide which outfit you're going to wear the night before. I don't often do the school run because the nanny does it, but now and again I feel I should put in an appearance.

The night before a school run I pour myself a glass of wine and have a browse in my dressing room. I try on a number of outfits and when I've decided on which looks the best I leave that one out for the morning. It only takes a few moments to dress in the mornings and I can get my hair and make-up done in just under an hour too.

I'm sure you're all keeping an eye on London Fashion Week to see what you need to be wearing for the school run in Spring/Summer 11. I'm loving seeing all the new collections darling. See you at the school gate!

I hope, as ever, you've found my advice useful sweeties. Ciao ciao for now xxx

Wednesday, 15 September 2010


I've decided to do a little contribution to The Gallery this week. Celebrate good times, come on! It's a celebration... Are Kool and the Gang still going?

Anyway darlings, my contribution to the The Gallery is a bottle of bubbly. My favourite tipple sweetie. And I'm celebrating because I'm going to stop drinking! Yes honestly. I haven't been drinking during my terrible illness and so I've decided I may as well stop. It's not good for you darlings. It's calorific and it gets me into all sorts of arguments and dodgy photos.

Rock Star has been officially teetotal since 1997. Well he's had to be otherwise he'd have died. He fell of the wagon in 1999, 2000, 2003, 2007, 2008 and last year. But in all fairness to him he went into rehab each time and worked hard on his recovery. I've seen what alcohol does to people and it's not pretty darlings.

So I'm never having another drink ever again. Not one. Ever. Never again will a glass of bubbly tickle my tongue. At all. Apart from on my birthday next month I'll have one because that's tradition.

Au revoir booze. I'll celebrate with some wheatgrass juice.

Photo (did you honestly think I had time to take my own? x)

Friday, 10 September 2010

I've been poisoned by someone famous

Well here I am gorgeous people. Still alive! Amazing really after my week of severe illness. I was poisoned sweetie and it was horrific.

Last weekend I attended a dinner party at a very famous pop star's house. It was wonderful darlings. I was squeezed inbetween a socialite and a sports star turned TV presenter. Rock Star sat next to one of the Loose Women. I didn't need to keep an eye on him this time because he goes for younger women.

So we gorged ourselves on exquisite food. I'd actually starved myself all day so I could enjoy the feast. After several nightcaps we staggered home (luckily we live within walking distance). I twisted my ankle in my Louboutins but Rock Star was unable to carry me because he did his back in after a stage dive in 1988. So I had to drag myself home and into bed and thought that was the last of my worries.

Well my darlings, it's safe to say the toilet bowl and I have been well acquainted for most of the week. The doctor only came out twice in the end, despite me informing his receptionist I was at death's door. He confirmed it was food poisoning but that was all he had to say. Can anyone recommend someone else in Harley Street?

Apparently a pop star turned actress was hospitalised after being ill too. Very famous pop star is embarrassed and has fired his cook. He sent me a gorgeous bouquet of lilies in the week so he's forgiven.

My guts are aching and I'm weak from lack of food. I've lost so much weight and I'm looking fabulous on it!

Bon weekend lovelies xx

Thursday, 2 September 2010

Past Life Regression Therapy and me

I’ve had a lot of therapy over the years sweetie. LOTS. I’m not sure why I need therapy more than other people, but I think being famous means you’re more likely to need it. And afford it.

I recommend therapy to everyone I meet darlings. And someone who thinks they don’t need therapy is actually more in need of it than someone who does. Isn’t that funny sweetie? I call it ‘being in denial’.

I first had therapy when I was a twenty year old model and single mum. My husband had just run off with a fellow model and left me to bring up Leaf on my own. I’d been a child actress and to be honest that screws you up more than anything. My first therapist was Dr T and he showed me how to nurture my inner child. After that I did Hypnotherapy with Dr A and Neuro Linguistic Programming with Dr K. There was some standard counselling with Dr T and then I discovered Aura Cleansing with Madam X. I still have my aura cleansed once a fortnight.

This week I underwent some therapy I’d not experienced before: Past Life Regression Therapy. I’ve always held the belief that I was a French harlot in Louis XVI’s royal court. It was wonderful fun darlings, let me tell you.

So for my session with Dr F, I was put under hypnosis and regressed to my past life. I expected scenes similar to Dangerous Liaisons. But do you know what sweetie? I was disgusted with the results. Dr F couldn’t find the French harlot at all, instead he came across Alf a fruit and veg seller in Borough Market who ended up dying in a workhouse at the age of 34.

I can only guess Dr F made it all up. What a load of crap. In future I’m sticking to therapy which I know is for real. My aura feels the need for an extra long cleanse next week.