Who I'd put on the naughty step

I've been tagged with my first ever meme! Isn't that exciting sweetie? The gorgeously blooming Pants With Names has challenged me with who I'd put on the naughty step. I've given this a lot of thought.

It's not so much 'who' but 'what'. And do you know what I'd put on the naughty step? Calories darling.

They're so naughty aren't they? I know you need a certain number of calories each day, but why do they tend to congregate in all the foods I like? It simply isn't fair. I hate celery and that has hardly any calories in it. I'm sure you burn more calories chewing the stuff than it actually contains. But when it comes to yummy cake, bicuits, chocolate and champagne - well they're full of these hideous calories.

Why is it darlings? I remember my gardener once moaning that slugs never eat weeds. And it's sort of the same with calories being in the foods you like and not being in the foods you don't. As a result we all have to eat these horibble low calorie foods and restrict ourselves with the nice, yummy stuff. It's not fair is it lovelies?

And why do calories make you put on weight? Why can't they do something else instead? Like make your hair grow faster so you don't need extensions.

I simply hate the things, they behave like this just to make life difficult and for that reason calories are going on the naughty step until they can stop being in my chocolate muffins and glass of bubbly. I hope it works.

I'm going to tag the following glamorous bloggers with this meme:

Yummy Mummy No1 (she has a fantastic taste in handbags)
Sandy at Baby Baby
Nickie at Typecast (I've just discovered the #fridaytwiz!)
Tara at Sticky Fingers
Laura at Yummy Mummy Flabby Tummy (the only blog I've discovered so far which plays music!)